THE TRUTH is that it isn't about the body fat, weight, or muscle tone. It is about being true to myself and taking care of what I have. I don't want you to think that I am one of those girls that compare themselves to everyone around them. I only want to feel good.
When I got pregnant with Layla 4 years ago I was in good shape, felt great, and was happy. I ended up getting a thyroid disease that I will have for the rest of my life. I am constantly tired, stressed, gaining weight while eating healthy, and just feel plain gross all the time. If I skip my meds or a day I can feel the change. And even when I constantly take them I just don't feel right.
This loosing weight and getting back to who I was before the kids is my way of taking charge of my life and the way I feel. I don't want to look back at life with regrets. My teacher yesterday said something that really hit home. He was talking about not comparing ourselves with anyone but our self and the person we can be and should be. He said we should look at "WHAT YOU HAVE DONE COMPARED TO WHAT YOU COULD HAVE DONE!"
I look back at the last four years of exhaustion and know that if I had eaten right and exercised I could have FELT better. I might have Had that energy of a single 21 year old. Instead I feel like the tired unnoticed stay at home mom. Why live in a fog of what should be or could be your life. I am taking a stand and doing something about how I feel. It isn't really about how I look, though we know we all want to look a little less jiggly. You just cant really measure or chart your progress about how you feel. I don't know if this makes any sense at all but oh well.
As a mother and wife I am always taking care of people and I really do enjoy it. But I have learned that unless we take care of ourselves we will have less and less to give.
That's so good you are taking that class and aiming for your goals. You'll be my inspiration...someday...if I ever stop being too lazy to actually make the goals in the first place! But I am all for feeling better, about my inside and out, and feeling less jiggly is always a plus! Good luck and thanks for being open about all this-it helps to know that others feel the same way and to see what they are doing about it!
ReplyDeleteI think you are awesome for taking the step and making the changes. I am about to do the same thing..dang baby weight! :) And even better, way to be brave and put this on your blog!! Of course, that is probably what I need to do to start being committed!
ReplyDeleteI think that that is one of the best parts of working out that is sometimes overlooked...not that you are losing weight and looking healthier (which is a great bonus) but that you FEEL good about yourself and take control of your body. Great job...I'm proud of you!
ReplyDeleteCan I just say that I totally love reading your blog? I think we must share a lot of common interests.
ReplyDeleteI wanted to say a couple of things... first, you're GORGEOUS! Keep in mind that while you feel like you do, you are still beautiful. While you're working, be sure to be happy with your body now. :)
Second, I know exactly what you mean about feeling like a listless, unthanked mom at home. I've had lots of thoughts about that, especially recently. I was getting so grumpy and felt so... well, you know what it's like when you feel completely unappreciated! When day after day it's the same thing over and over with no chance of it stopping. I decided to talk to my husband about some of the things that were bothering me, and in the process, realized that for me, I had to make some of the things happen that I needed, and not rely on anybody else. If I cleaned the house, I wanted to do it because *I* wanted the house clean, not because I was worried about what Jonathan or company would think... I wanted to be a good mom because I want to create the satisfaction of raising my kids the way I have always wanted to... Does that make sense? I don't want this to seem like a lecture. It's totally some personal insight that I've had recently right along the lines of what you're trying to accomplish.
You'll do GREAT losing weight!! Especially if the other part of your goal is to work out 4x per week. I've been working out 4-5x per week and have lost lots of inches--it's so satisfying! But still not enough! I feel like I have so far left to go. :) I think anybody dieting feels similarly whether they have twenty pounds or two million pounds to lose. :) You'll do great! I know it!
Perfect! I couldn't have said it better. Thanks!
ReplyDeletei think it's good for everyone to read your blog! It makes all the sense in the world. I think i'm going to have to join you and jenni... oh boy, here we go... :)
ReplyDelete