My life is busy, stressful, complicated, but oh so perfect. Occasionally, well most of the time really, I take that for granted. I forget to say thank you or I love you. I focus on all the parts of life I wish I could change. All the missed opportunities. Lately I have had reason to look hard at my life. When I was little what did I want to be? Am I that now. What should I do more? How can I be better? And most importantly how do I thank those who have helped me along my way?
My dad recently had his birthday. I wanted to get him a great gift. I looked hard at my bank account and realized that it wasn't going to be a gift you could hold in your hand. Instead I wrote a simple card. I thanked him for being a wonderful father. But most importantly I thanked him for being a man of God. He is the best example I have in my life. He is my compass to find my Father in Heaven. He has taught me all I know about our Father in Heaven. He has taught by words but mostly by example. I used to work hard to be a good daughter for him. Now I work to be a good daughter for the Lord. I am thankful for all the pressure I felt to do what is right. Now that I am older (and wiser) I realize that it wasn't pressure at all. It was a father begging and pleading his child to follow a path that leads to happiness. It certainly hasn't always been easy. But I have been happy and look back with no regrets. It isn't that I have been perfect but simply that I don't regret how I have come to be where I am at.
Life is short, much shorter than I have ever wanted to admit. I am not sure if it is the constant discussion about the "possibilities" and upsets that can come into our lives talks with Brian or all the recent news about our loved ones that has brought such a turn to look inward. It probably has a lot to do with the thoughts floating around about what I want next for my life. That mixed with my own fears, hopes, dreams, and many many words of guidance found in the form of enrichment speakers, sacrament talks, heartfelt prayers, and long standing words of those great prophets found in our holy scriptures. Either way I am taking every day at a time. I am not pushing myself to do everything today in fear I might miss the moment.
You know life does come only in moments. And when all is said and done it is those moments trapped in our memory and heart that we take with us. We take moments such as the first time your hubby smiled at you shyly before walking down the hall. That first feeling of accomplishment. For me that is silly but when I finally nailed a double pirouette on point. I worked for years to become a dancer and at that moment I knew I was one. Married life and parenthood bring a whole new meaning to "moments". I know Brian and I have a routine a rhythm and on a daily basis we don't even seem to realize our lucky we are to have one another. Not that we don't love each other madly and express that on a regular basis. I just mean that there are not as many stolen kisses or moments that take our breath away. I will say that we are working harder to make those moments for one another.
Don't get all weird on me it isn't like that! I simply mean that if you are married you should try finding moments that make him stop in his tracks. It might be kissing the back of his neck sweetly as he is busy typing away at the computer. Or basking in the moment when as you scrub away at the dishes he gently puts his hand on the small of your back as his reaches over to grab a washcloth to clean up your messy children's faces. Take time to notice all the little things that make up your rhythm.
Parenthood is a complication of moments and blur. It is our job to find the moments and saver them until another comes along our way. The more moments we find the more tolerable the madness of seeing our everyday shortcomings becomes. Parenthood isn't always hard because our children are crazy (however I do say most of them are) but rather that we somehow know that we have caused or contributed to said madness.
So here is to making the moments in life count. Take time to show, express, and remind those we love that we do in fact love and appreciate them. Life doesn't come with any guarantees so make it something you won't ever regret!
Here are some of my moments caught on film, those most of them are only a memory!
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